5 Cognitive Milestones That Can Disrupt Your Little One’s Sleep
When a little one goes through a cognitive milestone we may not even realize it is going on until it starts to really affect their sleep and/or behaviour. This is because a cognitive milestone goes on behind the scenes, in their brain, and usually isn’t something we see until it’s too late and is very obviously happening. I remember when all of my children had gone through cognitive developmental milestones. Why? Because I remember thinking their sleep was going great and out of no where they were waking frequently and their sleep had taken a 180… I distinctly remember thinking, “what in the world is going on here? What have I done to mess up their sleep? I thought things were going well!” In all reality, it had nothing to do with me and everything to do with the cognitive milestones they were hitting at that time.
Does this sound familiar? It may not be well known, but it is very common for little one’s to have their sleep disrupted while they are experiencing a developmental milestone - mental or physical. In this blog, I will be discussing 5 cognitive developmental milestones that can disrupt sleep, but I want to be clear that physical developments are just as disruptive to sleep. These can include rolling, sitting up, crawling, standing, walking and other physical developments that start basically from birth and happen until 12-18 months old or later. So keep that in mind as well!
5 Cognitive Developmental Milestones
Patterns: this cognitive milestone can occur around 6-8 weeks old. When your little one hits this milestone, they will perceive the world as patterns, instead of as one whole, intense perception. They will start to notice all types of different patterns through what they see, hear, feel, smell and even perceive them within their body and surroundings. For example, they will discover their hands and how they can move! They will even look at you differently and start to make noises which may lead into you having your first little “chat” together.
Awareness: this milestone can happen around 4-6 months old. Your little one will be learning so much from the patterns milestone that it all will start to really show itself in this milestone. They will be very talkative and will have their favourite sounds (and maybe love raspberrying), they will be even more coordinated and they will be able to see much more clearly.
Separation Anxiety: this cognitive development will occur around 8-10 months. During this milestone, your little one will realize that you can leave them and that you are not a part of them; they are their own person and so are you. You can walk into another room and leave them where they are - and that’s scary for them! They will usually have anxiety about this and they will make sure it is known by getting very upset. This can even occur when you are putting them down for sleep in their crib. When you are around people they don’t know, they will more than likely shy away from them and if they get too uncomfortable they may even start crying.
Language Increase: this milestone usually occurs around 18-24 months, but can occur earlier or later. You will notice your little one has a sudden burst of language and are talking your ear off. Sometimes what they are saying isn’t easily understandable, but it’s the fact they are speaking much more than usual that is an indication this milestone is going on. Once their language starts becoming more understandable this can also affect their sleep because they are learning how to actually say certain words, which can be a hard process!
Nightmares and/or Fears: nightmares can start to occur around the age of 3-6 years old and fears can happen around ages 3-4, but can occur as early as 2 years old. A lot of parents swear their babies are having nightmares, but it’s usually separation anxiety or a sleep regression that is occurring. Nightmares don’t actually occur until they are much older and can continue on for years. Fears can start as young as 2 years old and this can happen if they are exposed to scary shows, movies, books or anything along those lines.
These cognitive developmental milestones can all be very disrupting to sleep because your little one is discovering so many things about the world around them and about their own body. This is not only exciting to them, but also can be frustrating for them as they learn and experience the world around them and how they fit into it all. It is most definitely a process for them and even though it can be frustrating it is best to try to be as patient as you can during this time.
What can be done during this time?
When your little one is going through a milestone of any sort, it is very helpful for them that you can be patient and compassionate during this time. I know that may be hard because their mood will more than likely be fussier and clingier than normal and their sleep may be completely off, but trust me when I say your mood and reactions to their behaviour will make all the difference. It is important to make sure you are being consistent with your sleep training methods and not start assisting them to sleep in any way as this will lead to more sleep problems once this milestone has been accomplished. Understand that this is only a phase and will pass - your happy, well sleeping baby will be back so just hang tight!
One thing that is helpful to do when your little one wakes from sleep and starts to practice their new developmental skill is let them be. Even if they start getting frustrated, it is a good idea to let them try to sort it out on their own - that is how they learn! If you feel like they are truly stuck and need help, you can definitely go in. Once you have quickly assisted them, leave the room again and let them either go back to sleep or continue practicing their new skill. If they start to cry and you know they aren’t going to go back to sleep, you can bring them out and offer their next nap when needed.
Another helpful tool you can use to help your little one get better sleep is to allow them to practice their new skill as often as possible during their wake time. If they can get a lot of practice during the day, they will more than likely not feel the need to do it when they should be sleeping. So make sure to let them practice, practice, practice!
When it comes to nightmares, fears or even separation anxiety there are various things you can do to help this. Firstly, you can make sure to leave a dim light on in their room - the only thing I will say about this is it must be a dim, red light as red is known to have the least effect on melatonin levels. If the light in their room creates more fears (they can cast shadows in the room that may scare them), then you can put a gate on their door (so they can’t get out) and leave a hallway light on instead. You can even get a little more fun with it and create a “monster spray” (a spray bottle filled with water) and have your little one go through the room and “spray away” the monsters. You could also let them sleep with your t-shirt (as long as it smells like you), which can help with separation anxiety or any other fears they may have.
Noteworthy statement: I want to make it clear that the time frames listed of when a cognitive milestone will occur are only a guideline given so that you can know when your little one may start experiencing these milestones. They can most definitely occur earlier or later than stated and when they happen isn’t as important as the fact that they are happening. If your little one experiences these milestones earlier or later than stated that is okay! If you are having concerns that your little one isn’t hitting these milestones at all or way later than stated, then I recommend you speak with your doctor and get their expert opinion on whether this is normal or not.
If you liked this blog, please be sure to share it with other parents who may find it helpful. Spread the love! If you want more sleep tips and tricks from me, come join my sleep group called Sleep Little One where I give weekly sleep tips and advice to exhausted parents, like yourself, who are in need. I hope to see you there!!
If you’re looking for a more individualized 1:1 plan for your little one, I can help with that too! I have some amazing packages I offer that are sure to suit your specific little one’s needs so that you can all get on the road to better sleep. Not only do I come up with a plan for your particular little one, but I also will be there to help you along the way with any issues that arise and to congratulate you when you succeed! I will help your little one start sleeping better, be your guide along the way and help you succeed on this sleep training journey so you always know what to do if future issues arise! So what are you waiting for? Let’s get you on the road to better sleep!
Talk soon friends!
